i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize