You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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