...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
