She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
My dad is sitting where you rode me
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
