you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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