upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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