at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize
