First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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