real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
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