its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize