he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
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