So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
