Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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