i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
