I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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