Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
