haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize