SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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