Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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