I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
