Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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