just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
