Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
