im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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