she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
