my mouth tastes like poor choices
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
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