This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
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