you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
We just shotgunned beers for America
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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