Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
