the new term for farting is butt boxing.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
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