You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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