So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
