The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Randomize
