when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
40s are totally the cure
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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