wake up i wanna do it froggy style
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
