so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
