haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
is it fun? or sober?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
