he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
