i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
