he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Randomize
