I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
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