We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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