So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
