I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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