morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize