But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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