It's Friday. Sex?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
is it fun? or sober?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
