but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
