he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
