The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
So squirting runs in the family.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize